Resources

Hello dear!

This page is a list of recommendations from me to you.

Maybe you have worked with me and want to explore some topics more deeply, or you are interested in the people and modalities that influenced me. Below you find a selection. Enjoy!

ISTA

The International School of Temple Arts (ISTA) is the organization I’ve done the most work with. Their Spiritiual Sexual Shamanic Experience Courses (Level 1) are one week in-person deep-dives into your desires and boundaries, your body, your emotions, your inner masculine and feminine. I’ve attended and assisted in multiple Level 1 and Level 2 courses of ISTA around the world. It’s a life-changing experience.

Check out their website and watch this video to get a taste:

It’s an intense process. How do you know it’s right for you? You’ll feel it. You’ll know. If you’re unsure, feel free to reach out to me. ♥

Wheel of Consent

The Wheel of Consent by Dr. Betty Martin changed my life. It changed the way I perceive touch, but more importantly, human interaction. Understanding that giving and receiving can both be actively and passively experienced, and all four ways are equally valuable – groundbreaking! I totally recommend that you check out Betty’s work.

Her videos: I’ve rarely seen someone so relaxed and competent in teaching their work. These free videos are an incredible resource for anyone wanting to deepen their understanding of touch.

Get her new book: The Art of Receiving and Giving. Learn more with the School of Consent and follow them on Instagram.

Embracing Vulnerability

We love vulnerability! It’s what creates authentic connection to others, and what we keep on practicing doing the work.

The Queen of Vulnerability is, without a doubt, Dr. Brené Brown. She’s an extraordinary researcher in the areas of vulnerability, shame, courage and empathy. She wrote amazing books, has her own Netflix special, and one of the most watched TED talks of all time. Enjoy.

Non-Violent Communication

I first came into contact with Non-Violent Communication (NVC) through a friend who is teaching NVC in Israel. His perspective on human interaction was so incredible helpful in relationships, friendships, family and work that I decided to study it as well.

NVC is a beautiful methodology that helps us to separate our observations, feelings, needs and requests when we are interacting with another human. Through this, we actually learn to reach each other better and more deeply, to generate actual understanding, and solve conflicts with both sides feeling seen and heard. Love it.

Check out this website with NVC resources, this book from NVC’s founder Marshall Rosenberg or his excellent audio course, as well as the lovely teacher Yoram Mosenzon in the video below:

Relationships

Here are some recommendations for experts in the field of relationships that I continue to be amazed by.

Esther Perel

She’s a psychotherapist and author whose crystal clear insight and deep wisdom have been invaluable in my own relating and in my work. She talks about modern relationships with an emphasis on the role of eroticism, examining what society has taught us versus what is healthy for us, and how a relationship can actually flourish.

You’ll find countless interviews with her online, and each time she’s spot-on. Check out her website, her books Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence as well as The State of Affairs: Rethinking Infidelity, her Ted Talk about Infidelity or this amazing Ted Talk about Desire below:

Drs. John and Julie Gottman of The Gottman Institute

This is the place to go for relatinship research. The Gottmans have done decades of research on couples’ dynamics, what makes relationships work, what breaks them apart, and how to repair effectively.
They have online courses, books, a podcast and even an app for couples’ communication.

Sexuality

Sexuality is one of society’s most taboo topics (next to money and power). People’s sexuality has been repressed, denied, controlled and exploited for centuries. Why? Because it’s an incredibly powerful energy. It’s life force. People who have healthy access to their sexuality are usually more centered, more empowered and more satisfied with life in general. Unfortunately, sexual energy has been burdened with shame, guilt and fear for many people in their early lives, through their parents and society. But energy that gets suppressed will leak out in unhealthy ways. So it’s up to us to find a mature and positive attitude to our sexuality, and to heal the wounds that we’re carrying.

Here are my recommendations to start:

Layla Martin

Layla Martin is one of my main teachers and an absolute queen. She’s the founder of the Tantric Institute of Integrated Sexuality, has tremendous experience in traditional Tantra and other energy practices, and she makes it easily accessible for everyone, with a modern twist. Check out her website and especially her YouTube channel.

Women’s Sexuality

Specifically around women’s sexuality, I can highly recommend:

The book Come as You Are: The Surprising New Science that Will Transform Your Sex Life by Emily Nagoski.
The book Women’s Anatomy of Arousal by Sheri Winston.
The courses made by Olivia and the team of Self:Cervix.

Tantra

Tantra is an ancient spiritual philosophy that includes insights on all areas of life, including sexuality. Because Tantra is working consciously with sexual energy, it stands out from other traditions, and it’s received growing attention in the West in the last decades.

Very briefly, the core ideas that I deeply appreciate about Tantra are Non-Dualism (the Divine is not separate from us, but in us) and understanding the body and our experience as sacred; the teachings about using our energy to move what is stuck in us, so we can awaken; the understanding of masculine and feminine energies with their polarities; the importance of presence.

To get started with Tantra, have a look at:

The many books and amazing work of Margot Anand, one of the most renowned Tantra teachers.
The Tao Tantrik Master Mantak Chia and his teachings about energy and spirituality.
The book Urban Tantra by Barbara Carrellas.
My teacher Sasha Cobra’s website and her beautiful insight in the video below:

Spirituality

My most meaningful spiritual experiences came with the ISTA trainings, see above, as well as with Highden Temple. Their six week Temple Training was a major turning point in my life, a moment for me to realize and step into my soul’s purpose.

One of the key concepts is working with polarities, aka the cross – for example light and dark, masculine and feminine. Check out these YouTube videos about The Cross with Taki’h Antigoni Dhyandeepa, Bruce Lyon’s talk From Romance to Reality and this short video of Bruce being Bruce, bringing heartfelt, burning wisdom:

Trauma

Fortunately, the awareness of the impact of trauma has risen tremendously in the last few years. We are now recognizing how unadressed individual and collective trauma shapes our thought pattern, behaviours and emotional responses. And how we can gently and consciously move towards healing our trauma, so that we can be free as individuals and on a collective layer.

The main authorities on trauma that I recommend are:

Peter Levine

This psychologist shaped trauma understanding tremendously through his main book Waking the Tiger and the development of the healing modality of Somatic Experiencing™.

Bessel van der Kolk

A neuroscientist who wrote the groundbreaking The Body Keeps the Score, that allows us to understand how trauma affects the body, and how working with the body on the physical and emotional layer can move us towards healing. See his website here.

Gabor Maté

He’s a former doctor who had specialized in working with addictions, and found how the root cause of those is always trauma. Through his books, talks and courses he shows us ho meeting trauma compassionately is a powerful way of healing.

Thomas Hübl

Thomas Hübl is a spiritual teacher, and one of the leading researchers and facilitators around collective trauma and intergenerational trauma. See here his work, courses and even a trauma festival and his new book: Healing Collective Trauma.

And more

Here’s what else I recommend:

Podcasts:
The Embodiment Podcast by Mark Walsh
The Aubrey Marcus Podcast
The Tim Ferriss Show
How to Fail with Elizabeth Day
Happy Place by Fearne Cotton
Under the Skin with Russel Brand
Getting Curious with Jonathan van Ness

Books:
The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz
The Five Personality Patterns by Steven Kessler
The Spiritual Dimension of the Enneagram by Sandra Maitri

The Ocean at the End of the Lane by Neil Gaiman
All These Wonders by The Moth
Stories of Your Life and Others by Ted Chiang
The Carpet Makers by Andreas Eschbach

And if you find all the “Love and Light” a bit much sometimes (like me), here’s some refreshing self-aware darkness from my friend Dane Tomas.

If you have any questions or feedback, reach out to me via hello@rikejohn.com.

And if you’re interested in coaching with me, book a free discovery call here: calendly.com/rikejohn

♥